You have My Permission...

1 CommentThursday, 12 February 2015

Essemoh Teepee is our guest blogger. He has some thoughts to share in this week of the theatrical release of the 50 Shades of Grey movie.

(The opinions expressed in this blog are those of the author and not those of eSensual Books or Alternatepress Ltd.)

I am fascinated by women, all women. I enjoy everything about them, they are sensual, exciting and a great source of personal pleasure. I also despise the abuse of women either in a domestic environment or any other sort. We are equal yet different, I open doors, give way and my seat if circumstances are appropriate, not as an expression of superiority or demonstration of power, but out of respect and genuine care. So why is it that much of my audio and written work has elements of dominance, control and BDSM? Isn't that abuse?

50 Shades of Grey: the movie is premiered in the UK today, (12th February) The Critics are disappointed that the cinema experience is not the laughably terrible disaster they were hoping for, instead the screenplay, '...makes sense of the characters and plays down the potentially comic sex.' Others have said '...such a pity that on the day of Love, the dominant event is a movie about people thrashing each other and 'flayed labia'..' The writer and the books have come in for a lot of criticism, yet millions of women love them, the critics keep asking, 'Why are 'women' so silly?'

I began to read the first book in the 50 Shades trilogy, but became bored, I like my writing to be crisp and economical, but that is me, everyone is different, we should not have to conform to a 'norm'. My experience of women is that they are not 'silly', but many do seek something 'different'. Women are 'take charge' people. Society all over the world relies on women to make 'stuff' happen, the day to day, mundane tasks and events that are the basis of survival, from the Soccer Mom to the third daughter who is responsible for fetching clean(ish) water from a well a mile away. Women are 'responsible people' and carry the weight of expectations on their shoulders, backs and heads.

In my experience women seek to get out from under and, just for a while lay down the expectations of being 'responsible'. To be swept away and not have a choice to make, to simply be pleasured and enjoy their sensuality. Not having to decide to do something erotic, instead surrendering that responsibility to another, can eliminate guilt. Rather than 'guilty pleasures' they are overwhelming pleasures. I believe that many women, deep down, underneath any veneer, to some extent, crave that freedom.

We should stop trying to put women back into a 'socially' (male dominated) acceptable box, accept the facts and take pleasure in the reality. I don't think the 50 Shades Movie is going to help in any real way, but I think the freedom to talk about such things, give all women 'permission' to express those needs and desires is helping.

Essemoh Teepee

What do you think?

There are two new Modular DEV(c) audios with a BDSM theme to try here and several BDSM themed DEV(c) experiences available if you feel the desire to experiment safely with your submissive side. Enjoy.


Friday, 13 February 2015  |  11:00

A good point has been made that in my recent remarks I may have not been as inclusive as I might have been when giving examples of responsible women. I tend to use as few words as possible to make a point. In reality I have worked with women who were CEO's, Attorneys, Wives, Divorcees, Teachers, Religious Ministers, Therapists, Virgins, Experienced, College Co-eds, Retired and Queer women to list just some. Every one was deliciously different and endlessly fascinating. These amazing experiences, for which I am exceptionally grateful and most fortunate, have been an education. The need to feel free of judgement, to surrender responsibility, if only for a while and in a uniquely safe way has been the most common factor. Such a view is not, I believe, anti feminist, nor setting out a case for 'weakness'. Rather, in the face of what may be a fundamental biological/psychological need, women show incredible strength in being 'responsible' and taking charge of our survival. Just saying ... ;-)